Hey all,

It’s been a while since I’ve updated this site. If you follow me on twitter, you know that I’m alive and well, but also was deeply effected by hurricane Sandy. My hometown has been without power since the storm, the boardwalk near my house has been destroyed, with sand in the streets everywhere. People I know have nothing left – and for those who have homes still standing many have no power, heat or clean drinking water. The damage has been unthinkable. In that vein, I have realized how important it was for me to sign up for Fandom Fights Hurricane Sandy. I was not planning on writing fanfiction again, now firmly ensconced in my original fiction work, but I’m ready to bring Grungeward, Campward, ABCward, or Hippieward back to life for this cause. If you have a preference on what you’d like me to write, give me a shout, and please, PLEASE donate. You wouldn’t believe how much people, and animals displaced by the storm need your help.

Hi all,

If you’ve been following me on twitter, you know I’ve been doing a lot of tweeting from my original fiction account, @RGraceAllen. I’ve been putting a lot of work into my new original fiction blog, including synopsis for my works-in-progress, the Sinful Sunday Flash Fiction contest, book reviews, blog posts and more! You can also download in all my fanfiction in pdf, mobi or epub forms directly from that site! I won’t be updating this site much longer, so I hope you’ll go on over and check it out!

*hugs*
Aylah

Hey all!

It’s been about two months since I’ve posted anything here – it’s been a busy summer! I’ve been working on my novella, which is now in its last round of edits, and am currently in a critique group for my novel. I’m also excited to announce the launch of my original fiction author site, Rebecca Grace Allen. There you can find direct links to download my fanfiction, see all the flash fiction I’ve been working on, teasers from my upcoming works in progress, as well as some other racy little morsels that run through my mind. There will be book reviews and author interviews, blog postings on and you’ll also find the home of the all-erotica Sinful Sunday Flash Fiction contest!

This site will remain up for the time being, but posts will be few and far between! Be sure to follow me under my ofic twitter account, @RGRaceAllen, as well my ofic Facebook and Pinterest accounts! And I hope you’ll subscribe to my Rebecca Grace Allen site newsletter, participate and spread the word about the flash fiction contest, and get ready to come on and get sinful!

So this has been a bit of a big week for me – today is my wedding anniversary with my hubs and, a few days ago, I told my best friend from college about writing fanfiction. Many of us, whether we be writers or readers, keep our little addiction in the dark, hidden from our family and friends like it’s some sort of guilty habit. However I have found my family and friends to be incredibly supportive and understanding when I tell them what I write, and I also get some side-eyes kind of looks that tell me they’re thinking, “Yeah, that’s about right!”

On that note, I think it’s time I came out to all of you that I am in the process of writing some original fiction! No, I did not pull my stories to publish – what I wrote as fanfiction will stay fanfiction. No, I do not have a publishing contract or an agent or any of those completely awesome things that would make me feel like a real grown-up writer, lol! But, I am working on a novel that I hope will go somewhere, as well as few other novellas/short stories.

So if you want to hear more about my o-fic adventures, I’d love it if you’d give me a follow on my new twitter account – Rebecca Grace Allen. It’s debuting today as I am the judge for JenDAuthor’s Friday Picture Show Flash Fiction contest! I will also have a blog up in a few weeks, thanks to the very talented Kassiah at CreativeB.

Hope you’re all having a lovely summer!

*Hugs*
Aylah

…I just couldn’t NOT reblog this. Yet another article that brilliantly points out why The Book That Shall Not Be Named should not be getting the publicity it has. Here’s a snippet:

Where the book goes from being harmless garbage that even hobos wouldn’t burn to ward off pneumonia to being outright offensive is on page 286. After Edward spanks Anastasia for the first time (and her inner thought process makes us aware that she enjoys it), she tells him that she’d prefer he not hit her again because she did not like it. And still, she allows him to convince her to participate in similar activities, and she goes along with it because she wants to make him happy. This book treads some clearly defined non-consensual territory that presents an unhealthy view of a sexual relationship: If you don’t like it, ladies, suck it up. If you want to keep your man, you better do what he wants. Do they get the Lifetime Movie Network in West London?

If you want to read the full article, here it is!

*hugs*
Aylah

Hey all!

First of all, big smooshy snuggles to those of you who have commented on “A Little Goodbye” over on FF.net, or have contacted me here! You’ve all been so lovely and supportive and I want to hug the stuffing out of you all!

So, tonight I updated the “My Stories” section. It’s there for anyone who wants to revisit the summaries now that they are no longer on FF.net. You can also see all the beautiful banners HeatherdawnFF made for me – they’re so pretty, I swear I want to frame them and hang them on my wall! The page also now has the videos for The Ride and ABC Countdown.

The stories are all available on the blog to read, but if you want a pdf, mobi or epub version of any of them, feel free to ask!

And…I may have some announcements coming up in the near future, so be sure to stay tuned to the blog! Meanwhile, I will try to update more often with book reviews, links to the #flashfiction I’m doing, and whatever else come to my mind! I’m also on Pinterest now, so come check out all my random postings over there!

*hugs*
Aylah

I’m a finalist again at #5MinuteFiction on Nicole Wolverton’s blog! Be sure to check out the other finalists – @grizzarkhov @righteousgeek @iwritesmut @zencherry and don’t forget to VOTE!

I’d say that I’m sorry to be putting up yet another blog post on this topic, but really, I’m not. Because as a personal who both been sexually assaulted – and was so passionate about this cause that I spearheaded last year’s Fandom For Sexual Assault Awareness campaign with Coldplaywhore – but has also been involved with an emotionally abusive Dominant, I simply cannot shut up about how Fifty Shades describes an abusive, non consensual BDSM relationship. And the more articles I find detailing proof of this, the more I have to speak out.

The first two articles I’ve reblogged made me jump for joy, but the two I discovered yesterday not only made me very, very nervous, but also made me a little sick to my stomach. The reason being is that they point out, in no uncertain terms, that the relationship between Ana and Christian is not only non consensual BDSM, but is downright violent. That’s right, Domestic Freaking Violence people, and it is so disturbing to me that so many women, both in our little fandom and out there in the real world, are acting like that relationship is something they want. Because trust me, you don’t.

In the article 5o Shades of Domestic Violence, the author outlines her problem with the book.

[It's a] story that women all over the world are eating up and saying how bad they want a man like Christian Grey in their lives, how they wish their husbands were more like Grey.  That, my dear readers, is where I have a really big fucking problem with this book’s success.

She continues to say that

the thing that bothers me the most about this book is that it is so incredibly full of universal red flags for Domestic Violence (DV) and women all over the world are eating this book up like it’s cake.

Domestic Violence is not about anger management or just about physical abuse.  It’s about power and control over another person.  That can be physical control in the form of beating the shit out of someone, or emotional control through threats, isolation, and mind games.  As someone who has lived through emotional abuse I can say that it royally sucks and it’s just as awful dealing with someone emotionally beating you up as it is getting physically beat up.

An alpha can be an alpha without being an abuser.  Someone can assert themselves and be in control without having to control you.  The person who beat me never touched me physically.  But that person crushed my spirit, made everything bad in the world seem like it was my fault, blamed all of their problems on me, and kept me in this fucked up world where I actually believed that I was the problem.

Now, for those of you who don’t make the connection between Domestic Violence and Christian Grey, it’s outlined segment by segment in the article 50 Shades of Grey chapter 16 recap, or “Shit just got real.” It’s a must read, because as the author of 50 Shades of Domestic Violence Points out, “She used a Universal Red Flags checklist that I’ve used with victims of DV and she filled it out for Ana.  I don’t care if you’re a rabid fan of E.L. James and the 50 Shades trillogy and Christian Grey, if you read her post there is NO way you can say that this book isn’t full of DV.”

I want to applaud this next author for her bravery, and the time she took to painstakingly show, quote by quote, how this relationship is not only toxic, but downright dangerous.

“You’d kidnap me?”
“Oh yes,” he grins.
“Hold me against my will?” Jeez this is hot.

NO IT IS NOT. Here’s why it’s not hot. Even though the author is striving for a playful tone, it doesn’t work when the hero has already exhibited threatening behavior in a way that has truly frightened the heroine. This is not some cute little exchange, because Chedward has already stalked and intimidated Ana. He has threatened to rape her, he’s locked her into a room with him. He took her from a bar when she was passed out, and brought her to another city that is hours away from her home. He has proven several times that he has the money and the power to exert his will over her, making this conversation so completely not funny, and totally not hot. He’s telling her that she no long has the option of consent in this relationship, she’s either going to sign the contract and do things his way, or he’s going to force her. The only way it would be funny or hot is if we did not already know he would be perfectly capable of doing exactly these things.

Not convinced yet? Because some of those red flags she goes on enumerate upon should be things someone points out to our innocent little Ana.

• You feel uncomfortable about something he has said or done, and the feeling remains
• You feel bad about yourself when you are around him.
• You find yourself accepting him “for now” even though you have plenty of red flags that would help you to terminate the relationship if you paid attention to them.

Let’s remember this little part of the book, shall we?

I close the door and stand helpless in the living room of an apartment that I shall only spend another two nights in. A place I have lived happily for almost four years… yet today, for the first time ever, I feel lonely and uncomfortable here, unhappy with my own company. Have I strayed so far from who I am? I know that lurking, not very far under my rather numb exterior, is a well of tears. What am I doing? The irony is I can’t even sit down and enjoy a good cry. I’ll have to stand.

I remember those feelings. I lived through those feelings. And those are the feelings of someone who is being abused, NOT in a consensual, loving BDSM relationship where both partners understand and are COMFORTABLE with the terms. And Ana goes on to make every excuse in the book, lying to both her best friend and her mother about why she is crying. Tell me, if this was your best friend, your sister or your daughter behaving this way, would you say “Oooh, I want that kind of relationship for myself?” I don’t think so.

The author goes on to say that she has been

very careful to separate my comments re: abuse from consensual BDSM activities. I have to tread very gently here, because what I’m about to say is a minefield. Ana lies to Kate about falling down and hurting herself, so that Kate won’t know that Christian spanked her. Ana consented to be spanked, but her consent was forced by emotional manipulation, so it really wasn’t consent, at all. Now, she’s lying to her friend about what happened. Guess what we’re reading here? We’re reading a story about abuse, complete with the “I walked into a door” trope.

Kate suggests they drink some wine (because the state wide boil order has left the population with nothing but alcohol to drink, apparently) and Ana realizes that there were “warning signs” about Christian all along, she just wanted so badly to be with him that she ignored them. Rather than talk to Kate about it, she changes the subject to Kate’s day. As it turns out, Christian’s brother might be moving in with Kate and Ana at their new place in Seattle. Immediately, Ana thinks that Christian won’t like it, but then thinks he will have to suck it up. Good for you, Ana. You are not responsible for making sure the universe pleases Christian Grey.

And yet, the book goes on to have her continue to walk into the relationship, regardless of these little, very important, red flags, and makes me remember the expressions of indignation and fear on my friends’ faces when I did the same.

Enough said. This book makes my blood boil, it makes my stomach turn. Are the women around the country who are eating this shit up THAT removed from the truth? Because the more women who say they want their husbands to be like Christian Grey, the more I see the Republican assault on women creeping forward into our lives. But that’s a connection I’ll have to blog about some other time.

That is all.

Aylah

Hey all,

I’ve started participating in some flash fiction, just to keep my creative juices flowing. Tonight I’m a finalist in #5MinuteFiction on Nicole Wolverton’s lovely blog! Won’t you please go on over and give all the excellent entries a read? And don’t forget to vote!

*hugs*
Aylah

A month ago I announced that I would be taking down my stories at the end of May, and now that bittersweet day is here. I will forever remain proud of the time I spent in the Twilight fandom. The experiences I’ve had and the friends I’ve made have changed me, have supported me through good times and bad, and I have no doubt that some of them will stay with me forever.

My stories have always been about the characters finding themselves:

In Find the Cost of Freedom, Edward figures out how to stand up for what’s right, no matter what the cost, becoming a boy from a man.

In Welcome Foolish Mortals, Edward finds out he’s not the monster he thinks of himself as.

Candy Hearts Edward gives up the publishing company that is his birthright, and Bella discovers she’s more than an Ugly Duckling.

In Have Yourself a Sneaky Little Christmas…no, wait, that’s just smut!

My one foray into femmeslash has a Bella and Victoria who figure out what they want, only to have it slip away.

Teacherella finds her strength in ABC Countdown, and ABCward finds a way to forgive himself for Tanya’s abuse in All the Reasons Why.

In The Pact at Misty Mountain, Bella helps Edward to pursue his passion.

And, always near and dear to my heart, in The Ride SpinderBella and Grungeward let go of their tortured pasts through finding one another again.

The last two years I have been writing these stories has been a journey of discovery for me, and while it is hard to break away from fanfiction and take a leap in a new direction, all good things must come to an end. I am *not* pulling to publish – all my stories will remain fanfiction, and will stay on my blog, where I will continue to put random postings, book reviews, and information on my upcoming projects in life. I’m also happy to give out my stories in .pdf, .mobi or .epub files. I will also still be on twitter, where, if you care to hear about all the ramblings of my life, I hope you’ll drop by and say hi.

All my love to the readers who’ve been with me since my first terrified posting of chapter 1 of The Ride, and to those of you who’ve just found me – thank you.

*hugs*
Aylah